Bon Appetit Vienna Cream Danish

This is the worst pastry I’ve ever eaten. Bon Appetit, you are officially on my list. The Generalissimo not only refused to try it, but whipped out his Colt Anaconda and punched a pair of .44 holes in my plate, putting me out of my misery. And the antique table the plate was on. And the floor. Did I mention he uses explosive tipped rounds? Can you say “shrapnel wound to the shin?”

No frosting.

The bread was generic, bordering on useless.

The filling was gooey, flavorless, and made my stomach do a Triple Lindy off the 10M board.

I have but one question: are you effing kidding me? Because I’m not.

F

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