Harrod’s cheese Danish


If Wal-Mart is as American as apple pie and baseball, then Harrods is as British as spotted dick and cricket. So I had high hopes for their interpretation of our old friend, the cheese Danish. And they were were right on the money, sorta. Imagine a cellist that hits all the right notes but then decides to fart halfway through the performance. Yo-yo Ma would never think about breaking wind, so why ruin a Danish like this?

What am I talking about? I’ll let the Generalissimo explain, as he did it so much more eloquently than I.

“They put effing raisins in the effing cheese filling!”

Yeah, that sums it up. The bread was little dry, but not painfully so. The flavor of the bread was great, the texture was spot on, and the crusty edges from baking were a welcome treat. Near perfect scores.

The frosting was a tad dry, but a delight just the same. Sweet, but not overpowering. A gentle nudge of flavor to make you forget the dryness was even there.

Then, the cream cheese filling.

“It was sublime!” he said as he wiped a tear from his mustache. “Then they…they…I cannot say it!”

I will. Underneath a moist, sweet, perfectly tarted filling, below a texture so smooth you could call it Billy Dee Williams, lurking where nothing but perfection should have roamed with impunity…

Raisins. They put effing raisins in the effing cream cheese filling. Someone should be dragged out into Brompton Road and shot.

So close, yet no cigar.


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